This is going to be extremely random. So many thoughts chasing themselves around in my head like the Black Friday shoppers looking for that “great deal.” I only mention the shoppers because I imagine that’s what it feels like. So many deals, elusive or otherwise, and you hope to capture one before it slips through your still-greasy-with-turkey-juice fingers. That’s what writing is like for me. An idea presents itself and if I don’t grab it right then…poof! Gone, faster than it appeared.
And I say I imagine that’s what it feels like because I wouldn’t know about the actual shopping. The closest I’ve come to that special kind of crazy is accidentally going into Walmart this past Thursday evening to get a few groceries that we needed and seeing a line of people, yellow tape sectioning off certain areas, a police officer ready for the crazy to commence, and employees standing around with what I could only call dread on their faces. We normally wouldn’t have been in there, but funds (or lack of) and timing sometimes present themselves in odd and inconvenient ways, so we got in and out fast with our groceries. I say no thanks to Black Friday shopping. My mom and oldest brother used to do the 4am Black Friday shopping. I never went with. I don’t know if they still do it. I don’t ask because I don’t even want to know. That’s how much I hate the idea. If I was going to participate in anything like this, I’d do the Small Business Saturday thing, but I haven’t done that either.
NaNoWriMo is winding down, the last week looming like an insurmountable mountain, or for some people maybe it’s like riding a bicycle downhill, gaining momentum toward the finish line where they’ll celebrate and shout all the way to the top of that mountain. Whichever group you fall into, I hope you’ve had fun, and keep writing. Me? I’m in the insurmountable mountain club. I started out strong, and then switched to another idea that I liked better, and now both have petered out. I still like the second idea better. It’s one I seem to return to every time NaNoWriMo rolls around, but haven’t been able to finish. The premise is the same, but the story is always new because I’m no Nano rebel. Should I stop messing with it because I can’t seem to finish? I don’t think so. Not yet, anyway. I’ll know when or if I should can it altogether. I’ll probably continue working on it once November is over. The goal is missed, which is the whole point of writing 50k words in 30 days, but that’s okay. If I can find the motivation to open the document again, I’ll chip at it a little bit at a time.
I’ve been writing some poetry and that feels good. If I can knock out a poem, I feel like the day wasn’t completely wasted. It’s the sense of accomplishment, of having completed something instead of having a whole novel ahead of me, months of writing, researching, editing. I need to look at that in smaller parts rather than as a whole because it gets overwhelming, even as long as I’ve been writing.
A few months ago, I discovered Life Planners by Erin Condren. I needed something to help me get better organized and stop procrastinating. I fell in love with the idea of these planners and all of the different designs. I found out that a local store carries the planners and supplies, and because I’m totally impatient, I wanted a planner in my hands that day instead of waiting on an order to come in. I bought the watercolor design that has ‘be fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire’ on the front cover. Perfect, right? Well, I think I’ve had more fun decorating the monthly and weekly layouts than sticking to actual goals. Self realization moment: not much is going to help in the way of planners until I get serious about what’s important to me. You know, the whole you can lead a horse to water thing…
I might post pictures of the planner and some of the page layouts at some point. They’re totally fun.
This past week, I signed up for a writing webinar that dealt with carving out time to write in our busy lives. I’m not sure I learned anything that I didn’t already know. By the end of the webinar, I think I was more frustrated than inspired, though that was no fault of the host. It’s just hearing how other people manage to write x number of books, while raising x number of kids, working a full time job, and having other obligations somehow settles in my brain as I’m not good enough and I’ll never finish what I start because life gets in the way. Hiccups happen, life happens, it just takes me so long to bounce back, refocus and try to carry on. I shouldn’t compare myself to others, I know that. Everyone’s situation is different, everyone is different. It’s harder right now because my time really isn’t my own. I know, it sounds like an excuse but it’s true. I just need to figure out how to make what little time I have for myself work for me. If it means getting up an hour earlier, I guess that’s what I have to do. For me, the highlight of the webinar was a point about scheduling writing appointments. I liked that idea! The trick to that is figuring out just when I won’t be interrupted. 6am – 8 am? 2pm – 5pm? Huh. Look at that. I think I just set aside some time for me to write. There’s a huge gap between 8am and 2pm because this is the time when Life happens around here. Most days this makes me completely exhausted and I have nothing left to give once I finally get some quiet time. But, we’ll see how I do with those two times for a while. If it works, but I still need to schedule more sessions, I can do that from 11pm-12pm. I’m feeling better about this already.
And just so you know how slow I am at writing, this post alone took me from afternoon ’til now (almost 7pm) to write. Distractions abound!